Long Distance Call

I miss Z so much right now...
I'm counting the minutes until we're together again.


Even if we can never really be together, even if it never works out, he will always carry that piece of me, that dog-eared corner of my heart. But that's okay. 'Cause I know he'll keep me safe, and that part of me will rest, forever sheltered in the life-worn grotto of his nimble-fingered hands.

Unrequited Love

Oh, God, why does it have to hurt so much? Why? It's not like I wasn't expecting it... But it still hurts, and now it won't stop. Can't you make it stop?


I thought love was supposed to feel good. Well, apparently someone lied. Because it's not good. It's warped and twisted, dark, filled with spite, laced with regret, hindered by shame. All those butterflies I felt before? They're dead. Didn't even make it out of the cocoon. Cold, dead butterflies, nestled in the cavern of my soul. And now, I can't even get them out. I'm that fragile.

Introducing...My Version Of Hobby Lobby

Wishes by Whoa it's ʀσxƴ♥ilyJonasBrothers on Polyvore.com

So I've discovered a new hobby, and, in case you haven't already guessed, it just might have a little something to do with a little site called polyvore. Wink.

So It Was All For Nothing?

 



















You know what I hate? I hate waking up early, getting all gussied up so I can look good for my boy, and then driving to school, so proud of myself for actually putting some kind of effort into my appearance, only to discover that he's not even there to witness my transformation. I even took the trouble to accessorize! I matched my socks. It was a truly epic day. Only he wasn't there to celebrate it. Just peachy. 

But now at least I know someone Up There is out to get me. Forgive me, but I must interrogate said torturer at this time. 

Are you happy now? Are you finally satisfied with my plight? 'Cause I don't think I can take much more of this. I'm nutty enough as it is.

Undoubtedly, it would all come down to a stupid orthodontist. Does it really take that long to stare at teeth? Really?

Men. Huff.

Black-Eyed Blinker

So, in case you haven't heard, Super Saver won the Derby, say, a week ago. Talk about procrastination.Oh, well. Life goes on. Presently, my own personal brand of Derby Madness deems to take its annual U-Turn. A detour that brings us face-to-face with the historic hilltops and Susan-strewn turf of Pimlico Park, waspishly blotched with the distinct catch of pure Pennsylvanian charm. 

Of course, Borel's probably even more enthused than me. Which isn't an easy feat, mind you. Apparently, he thinks he's gonna snag the ever elusive Triple Smacker this time around on Saver. I don't mean to be a party pooper...I hate those, just as much as everyone else...but, somehow, I doubt it.

Ah, well. Jockeys need some quality time with good old dreamland, too. Right?

Sneezing and Coughing and...Feet?

I'm pretty sure that I've mentioned this sometime before, but, nevertheless, even if I have, you're gonna have to bear with me. And if you can't do that, then my advice would be to just get over it. I'm still gonna talk about it. Well, with that said... 

I've always worn socks to bed. Weird, huh? But, you see, it's for a good reason. It's like this - whenever I forget to wear them, I always get sick. Always. It never fails. And, quite honestly,when it comes to the biological reasoning behind it, I'm just as clueless as you are. Well, most of you. Whatever. I don't know why. So, over the years, I've come to accept that that's just the way it is. Thus, I've been sick. What can I say? Life's a moody landlord. Go figure. Shrug.

An (Unofficial) Breach Of Teenage Etiquette

 

So I woke up this morning, and I was all excited, because I thought I was going to get to hang out with my bestie. Who shall, henceforth, be called Biffs. Don't ask. Turns out, Fate had other plans. Or rather, my mother did. 

Instead of spending some quality time with Biffs, I get to go out with my grandmother. Now don't get me wrong. I love my Granny. Love her. And we had a lot of fun. Yet, all the while, I found myself thinking of Biffs, my beloved bestie, and all the chaos we could have created, all the memories, the random adventures, we could have made. 

Moral of the story: It should be a federal offense, or at least a slight misdemeanor, to separate one from said bestie. It really should. 

P.S. - Isn't that pup adorable? Sorry. I couldn't resist its cuteness, sad as it might be.

Maybe...

Well, today started out pretty inconspicuously - or so it seemed. Just an average American breakfast, complete with triangular syrup packets. We set off promptly, still sleepy-headed and bed-ridden, Tom-Tom in hand. Twenty minutes later, we arrived at our destination, the Nashville Rescue Center. My own experience consisted, almost entirely, of pouring grape juice. A simple enough job, but meaningful just the same. Others shoveled out rice and passed out trays, heavily laden with fresh bread and pastel-colored cubes of various forms of store bought cake and homemade cookies, still warm from the oven. As the day progressed, it gradually became clear that this wasn't just some chore, some duty we had to perform. The difference that a smile, the smallest act of kindness, had upon these people was, in itself, astounding. And, the thought comes to mind, that if everyone, or even just a select few, would reach out to those beside them, or even across from them, the world might not be a better place, but, maybe, just maybe, it could be a happier place. Maybe.

If the NRC was the entree of the day, the high ropes was the main course. As our group struggled through, the psychological bonds were shredded, and, everyone, myself included, found a confidence, a determination, that we might not have even known was there.

So here I am at the end of the day, looking back on all that has come to pass, and all I can remember is, the one thing that sticks out in my mind, is the sheen of inspiration I saw reflected in my companions' eyes as Demitri and Matt, both YWAM volunteers, chronicled their spirtual journey - a gleam I can only describe as the realization, the anticipation of possibility, the conclusive power of this last final maybe.

[Originally published on church blog]

It's Necromania!

She sees dead people - and they see her.

Chloe Saunders used to have a pretty normal life. But that changed on the day she met her first ghost. Locked up in Lyle House, a group home for troubled teens, she finds out that there's more to the home's teen residents than meets the eye. Will Chloe be able to uncover the dangerous secrets of Lyle House...or will its skeletons come back to haunt her?

This thrilling first volume in the supernaturally charged Darkest Powers series by international bestselling author Kelley Armstrong will keep readers awake well into the darkest time of night.

I know. Cheesy, right? But, suprisingly enough, it's actually much better than it sounds. Which isn't saying a lot, really, but still.

So, in case you couldn't tell, I have a bit of an odd taste in books. Not exactly scary, but not entirely sane. But, whatever. Moving on...

So when it first starts out, Chloe's just kind of, well, there. She's really not that interesting. Except for the fact that she's fifteen - and she still has to get her period. That may not seem all that interesting to most people, but it is to me, all right? See, I was an early bloomer.  A major early bloomer. I got my . when I was ten. Fun times.

Nevertheless, as the pages progress, the plot gets pretty, um, intricate. For lack of a better word. Well, let's just say her dad basically thinks she's gone wacky, so he sends her to an asylum. Yeah, when your kid starts freaking you out, send her to some obscure place you've never heard of to be with other crazy people. That makes a lot of sense. Oh, well. I'm not a parent. Yet. I'm kidding!

Okay, I really wanna talk to my friend right now. Hate to leave you hanging, but if you really want to know what happens, read the freaking book. That's all I've got to say. Read the book. That is all. Farewell.

Updated --- 9.25.2010